The Devil Queen

How my wife and I sold our souls to the Queen Anne Victorian we tried to save.

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Location: Crow Mountain, Arkansas, United States

Synopsis: This is a cautionary tale. A seriously disturbed couple find the charming, old ruin of a Queen Anne Victorian in Russellville, Arkansas, and buy it for $1.00. They tore the roof off, cut it in half, and had it moved to some land they owned sixteen miles away because they didn't know any better. Since then, they have hired and fired contractors, had all of their tools stolen, re-wired, re-plumbed, insulated, and essentially rebuilt the entire house. Their only problem is that after four years it still isn't finished. Now they are tired, broke, and wonder what in the hell it is they've done to themselves. And, it's haunted.
(Last updated on April 3, 2008)

Press: Russellville Courier Article - December 2003, HGTV website article, AP story - October 2006, and Victorian Homes Magazine - February 2008 (link coming soon).
Art: From time to time, I receive requests for my art. If you would like to look at more of my art, go to The Failed Artist. If you would like to buy my art, email me. I am more than happy to answer any questions you might have. Thanks!

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

The 2006 Dumbass Award

Well, Thanksgiving came and went, and the 2006 Dumbass award was given. This year (as per my prediction) the award went to Casey, a fifteen year old cousin of my wife. She is now the youngest person to have won the award.

To be honest though, the award winning story was a little anti-climatic this year. In addition for not being able to give Jack directions to her house because she wasn't home, she also won for getting lost in her own backyard. I missed some of the details, so I'm not sure how big their backyard is. I'm guessing a few acres. Sure that sounds big, but the Devil Queen is on over three acres, and I have no idea as to how you could get lost on that little land even if it was heavily wooded. What was even better is that she had her cell phone and called her grandfather for help. He told her that he knew where she was and he'd come and find her. He asked to her to stay right where she was until he got there. She didn't. Apparently they had her whole immediate family and the neighbors out looking for her before she turned up. Nice.

I was shocked that I didn't even get nominated. I mean, I was sure I'd win for this. I guess no one remembered it, and, since I'm as vain as I am wicked, I wasn't going to tell on myself.


Anonymous Maryam in Marrakesh said...

Getting lost in her own backyard?!Now THAT is priceless. I like these dumbass awards. I think I am going to institute them in my own family (although slightly alarmed that I might be win every year...)

8:26 AM  
Anonymous Brenda from Flatbush said...

Yes, these are better than the much-hyped 'Darwin Awards,' perhaps because the winners get to survive and pick up their prizes! It is indeed tempting to institute them at our house, although it'd be a shame if the cats couldn't qualify...

10:14 AM  
Blogger John said...

Speaking of prizes, we're thinking about giving an actual prize for winning the Dumbass Award. Currently, all the winner gets is a plaque with their name (and the previous winners) on it.

We're hoping if we offer cash & prizes that we'll get more stories. You know, sweeten the deal.

2:37 PM  

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