Decrapification Continues
I won't bore you with the details. Another night of excavating, another five bags of trash hauled to the curb. For those of you who don't live to tally the amount of trash generated by the Devil Queen and her occupants, that is nine bags of trash in two weeks.
Aside from reclaiming all of this long submerged square footage as actual living space, this has been a profitable endeavor. Literally. Last night while sorting through a stack of old papers, Christmas and birthday cards from years past, and whatever else it is crazy people collect, I found a crisp, clean fifty dollar bill. I'm guessing this was a gift that we lost track of one year. Nice.
If you calculate out how many hours it took me to find this, I'm still not making minimum wage but what the hell. It's enough to buy Christmas dinner for everyone which is good enough for me.
At some point, I just had to wonder what year it was that I went shit-bat-crazy and decided to keep this stuff. The construction material is the worst at this point: tin cans full of bent, rusty nails; broken light fixtures; four inch bits of PVC plumbing; and, my current favorite, little coils of old, filthy wires. I mean you never know when you might want to wire a whole electrical circuit with thirty or forty 12-to-18 inch bits spliced together. Bring on the roaches, the nukes, and the whole Jesus-in-sky apocalypse! We are ready! We'll save Western Civilization in all its glory with a box of old wiring and tin of rusty nails. Don't mess with us, we're obviously ready for anything. Except refinishing the floors.
Aside from reclaiming all of this long submerged square footage as actual living space, this has been a profitable endeavor. Literally. Last night while sorting through a stack of old papers, Christmas and birthday cards from years past, and whatever else it is crazy people collect, I found a crisp, clean fifty dollar bill. I'm guessing this was a gift that we lost track of one year. Nice.
If you calculate out how many hours it took me to find this, I'm still not making minimum wage but what the hell. It's enough to buy Christmas dinner for everyone which is good enough for me.
At some point, I just had to wonder what year it was that I went shit-bat-crazy and decided to keep this stuff. The construction material is the worst at this point: tin cans full of bent, rusty nails; broken light fixtures; four inch bits of PVC plumbing; and, my current favorite, little coils of old, filthy wires. I mean you never know when you might want to wire a whole electrical circuit with thirty or forty 12-to-18 inch bits spliced together. Bring on the roaches, the nukes, and the whole Jesus-in-sky apocalypse! We are ready! We'll save Western Civilization in all its glory with a box of old wiring and tin of rusty nails. Don't mess with us, we're obviously ready for anything. Except refinishing the floors.
Labels: Decrapification, filth, mental illness, money
posted by John | 5:42 AM
3 Comments:
Lol..between your stuff and what I've managed to squirrel away in my basement....we could probably save Eastern Civilization too!
You crack me up! LOL
Hey, I just got real brave and threw away...my pine cone collection. It took real courage to admit that I wasn't gonna Martha Stewartize those babies. Your courage must be contagious.
BTW, within 48 hours you will probably desperately need an 18" coil of wire or a wee little chunk of PVC. Try not to be too hard on yourself.
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