The Devil Queen

How my wife and I sold our souls to the Queen Anne Victorian we tried to save.

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Location: Crow Mountain, Arkansas, United States

Synopsis: This is a cautionary tale. A seriously disturbed couple find the charming, old ruin of a Queen Anne Victorian in Russellville, Arkansas, and buy it for $1.00. They tore the roof off, cut it in half, and had it moved to some land they owned sixteen miles away because they didn't know any better. Since then, they have hired and fired contractors, had all of their tools stolen, re-wired, re-plumbed, insulated, and essentially rebuilt the entire house. Their only problem is that after four years it still isn't finished. Now they are tired, broke, and wonder what in the hell it is they've done to themselves. And, it's haunted.
(Last updated on April 3, 2008)

Press: Russellville Courier Article - December 2003, HGTV website article, AP story - October 2006, and Victorian Homes Magazine - February 2008 (link coming soon).
Art: From time to time, I receive requests for my art. If you would like to look at more of my art, go to The Failed Artist. If you would like to buy my art, email me. I am more than happy to answer any questions you might have. Thanks!

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Kenny: The New Cocaine

I'm still waiting to pay through the nose for all the good karma I've been enjoying the last couple of weeks. In the mean time, I am in junkie heaven. The only thing more addictive than hard drugs is a good contractor working for a quarter of the going price.

If figure that I can keep Kenny for two more weeks, but I'm already scheming a way to pay for a third week. All the crap that has accumulated since Christmas in our storage room is going on eBay. As soon as all the W-2's and 1098 forms come in, our taxes are getting filed. It's only a matter of time before I'm selling my ass on street corner, although I hear that organ mugging is pretty lucrative too.

As with any other good drug, Kenny has completely undermined the last vestige of our protestant work ethic. We spent all weekend lounging around our house like it was an opium den. At four o'clock in the afternoon, we're laid out in the living room, and we're still wearing our pajamas.

My wife looks up at the clock and says, "I guess we should go work on the house?"

"Hmm. Maybe tomorrow. Kenny is doing such a good job . . . " I shrug. "Lets have a risotto for dinner. Wine?"

So, we didn't do squat on the Devil Queen this weekend. As close as we came to working on it was making Kenny a to-do list for this week. And the worst part is that I don't feel guilty about it. Well, not enough to admit it.

I spoke with Kenny last night, and he should be starting on our hall bathroom today. It ought to be interesting. Taking a cue from Gary, I'll leave you in suspense here. I'll just say that we've found a innovative use for some scrap lumber. I think that it'll look good, but, if it doesn't, we'll just have to live with it since we don't have the money or materials to redo it.


Blogger Kristin said...

Lounging around like it's an opium den ... lol, you are the best. :)

10:29 AM  

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