The Devil Queen

How my wife and I sold our souls to the Queen Anne Victorian we tried to save.

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Location: Crow Mountain, Arkansas, United States

Synopsis: This is a cautionary tale. A seriously disturbed couple find the charming, old ruin of a Queen Anne Victorian in Russellville, Arkansas, and buy it for $1.00. They tore the roof off, cut it in half, and had it moved to some land they owned sixteen miles away because they didn't know any better. Since then, they have hired and fired contractors, had all of their tools stolen, re-wired, re-plumbed, insulated, and essentially rebuilt the entire house. Their only problem is that after four years it still isn't finished. Now they are tired, broke, and wonder what in the hell it is they've done to themselves. And, it's haunted.
(Last updated on April 3, 2008)

Press: Russellville Courier Article - December 2003, HGTV website article, AP story - October 2006, and Victorian Homes Magazine - February 2008 (link coming soon).
Art: From time to time, I receive requests for my art. If you would like to look at more of my art, go to The Failed Artist. If you would like to buy my art, email me. I am more than happy to answer any questions you might have. Thanks!

Wednesday, August 01, 2007

Categorically Unfit For Human Society, Reason 332

Here is a little secret for you. My neurosis, paranoia, and general misanthropy are pretty well known at this point, but I have a nagging, secret fear. I don’t know why it has been on my mind so much recently. Maybe it was everyone wanting to sell me life insurance when we refinanced the house and bought a new car?

Lately, I’m worried if I meet an untimely end in the near future that my soul will be trapped in the Devil Queen. Forever. Putting your blood, sweat, and tears into a house renovation is one thing, but wandering its halls until Doomsday is way too much. So, if I fall and snap my stupid head off, stop the clocks, cover the mirrors, and throw all the windows open. If that doesn’t work (believe me, you’ll know), do it like the Navaho and tear some holes in the walls and abandon the house. And, if that doesn’t do it, burn it down. Really. This house has been hell enough already.

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4 Comments:

Anonymous Tarr said...

John -

Time to think about cool mountains or clear ocean water.

A break. Take a break.

4:58 PM  
Anonymous Brenda from Flatbush said...

Not to worry. You won't haunt your own house. You will have the wit, even in the Great Beyond, to haunt the houses of your worst contractors. Bwaa-ha-ha-ha-ha!!!

8:08 PM  
Blogger Gary said...

Dude.

You need to lay off the methylated spirits!

8:31 PM  
Blogger John said...

Tarr, I'll give it a try.

Brenda, while I am at it, why not possess them?

Gary, maybe the problem is I'm not getting enough. Withdrawl is a bitch.

6:44 AM  

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