The Devil Queen

How my wife and I sold our souls to the Queen Anne Victorian we tried to save.

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Location: Crow Mountain, Arkansas, United States

Synopsis: This is a cautionary tale. A seriously disturbed couple find the charming, old ruin of a Queen Anne Victorian in Russellville, Arkansas, and buy it for $1.00. They tore the roof off, cut it in half, and had it moved to some land they owned sixteen miles away because they didn't know any better. Since then, they have hired and fired contractors, had all of their tools stolen, re-wired, re-plumbed, insulated, and essentially rebuilt the entire house. Their only problem is that after four years it still isn't finished. Now they are tired, broke, and wonder what in the hell it is they've done to themselves. And, it's haunted.
(Last updated on April 3, 2008)

Press: Russellville Courier Article - December 2003, HGTV website article, AP story - October 2006, and Victorian Homes Magazine - February 2008 (link coming soon).
Art: From time to time, I receive requests for my art. If you would like to look at more of my art, go to The Failed Artist. If you would like to buy my art, email me. I am more than happy to answer any questions you might have. Thanks!

Friday, July 31, 2009

The Home Inspection and Another Bleedin' Tease

I'm sorry about the long silence. I am superstitious though, and I'd hate to jinx myself. The way things have been going, I can't help but think that I'm cursed. But, I'm getting ahead of myself now.

Anyhow, the story. We have an offer on the Devil Queen. There was a lot of the usual back and forth, and finally buyers and I were in agreement. As I mentioned, there was a home inspection. I was dreading this for a variety of reasons. The big one is that house is still technically not finished. I still consider it to be under construction. Therefore, this leaves a lot of issues that still might need to be worked out.

A secondary worry was: what if they actually found something wrong that we didn't know about like a leaking pipe, twenty raccoons living in the crawlspace, or a roof leak? You know, something horrible.

As it was, I think we lucked out. There were three things marked on the report that we needed to "fix."

1) Repair a "broken" electrical conduit under the house.
2) Physically mark the septic tank and drain field.
3) Physically mark the water shut-off.

First, the electrical conduit was not broken. We ran the main power lines from the power pole to the breaker box through a plastic conduit. The conduit was buried from the pole and under the house. It then comes above ground and makes two 90 degree turns before it runs up into the pantry wall to the breaker box. Apparently, when we ran the conduit up to the box, all wiggling and swearing popped the glued joint on the first 90 degree turn. So, all I had to do was clean the conduit and re-glue it. It didn't even take 5 minutes.

The other two items don't really count as repairs or real issues in my opinion. It's more like a request. Anyhow, my friend Jack was kind enough to wade through the deep grass and pound in some stakes so I didn't have to get anymore poison oak on my legs than I already had. I still owe him a case of beer for the service which I will take care of if I ever close on the Devil Queen.

The home inspection hurdle was cleared, but things don't end there. More to come.



Anonymous Kate H. said...

What's the schedule like if all goes well? And once the Queen is someone else's responsibility, where do you all go?

(I have this strange imagination of the three of you driving off in a wagon full of goods and chattels, you clucking Gee-up! to the horse, but no, probably not.)

11:27 AM  
Blogger John said...

As for going well, we missed that boat a week or so ago.

As for the future, if it does not involve whiskey, I'm not interested.

1:03 PM  
Anonymous Home Inspection said...

Let’s look at some of the problems that could occur if you don’t get a home inspection. Major problem is that something is wrong with the house.

9:39 AM  
Anonymous Panel Clips said...

You said it! Home inspections can be both agonizing and misleading. You can never get a true read as to what the appraiser is thinking.

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