The Devil Queen

How my wife and I sold our souls to the Queen Anne Victorian we tried to save.

My Photo
Location: Crow Mountain, Arkansas, United States

Synopsis: This is a cautionary tale. A seriously disturbed couple find the charming, old ruin of a Queen Anne Victorian in Russellville, Arkansas, and buy it for $1.00. They tore the roof off, cut it in half, and had it moved to some land they owned sixteen miles away because they didn't know any better. Since then, they have hired and fired contractors, had all of their tools stolen, re-wired, re-plumbed, insulated, and essentially rebuilt the entire house. Their only problem is that after four years it still isn't finished. Now they are tired, broke, and wonder what in the hell it is they've done to themselves. And, it's haunted.
(Last updated on April 3, 2008)

Press: Russellville Courier Article - December 2003, HGTV website article, AP story - October 2006, and Victorian Homes Magazine - February 2008 (link coming soon).
Art: From time to time, I receive requests for my art. If you would like to look at more of my art, go to The Failed Artist. If you would like to buy my art, email me. I am more than happy to answer any questions you might have. Thanks!

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Is My Caulk Big Enough?

I am a captive of my own mind. Lately, I can not escape from this self-made, bastardized parody of a Dead Kennedy song, Pull My Strings.

Is my caulk big enough,
Is my brain small enough
For you to make me a star?

Give me a toot
I'll sell you my soul
Pull my strings and I'll go far

The worst part is that isn't even particularly fun nor does it make much sense, even to me.

Like every other frustrated home improvement monkey, I've been playing with my caulk for two or three hours every day. Don't worry, in the interest of health and safety, I always try to keep latex between me and my caulk though the occasional breakage is evitable. It’s a good thing rubber gloves come 10 to a pack.

Actually, I only squeezed in 45 minutes of caulking last night. Why? Because I finished caulking all the cracks in the laundry room ceiling.

Of course you may wonder why there are cracks in the ceiling since the laundry room is in one of the two new additions to the Devil Queen. The short answer is we used salvaged (or is it cooler to say "reclaimed"?) beadboard. Beadboard, like a good kiss, ought to have a little tongue. Unfortunately, salvaged beadboard has an propensity for loosing its tongue during removal. We got pretty good at saving it, but a large majority of it has damaged or entirely missing tongue. And, the laundry room ceiling got the dregs of our beadboard selection.

The cracks weren't too noticeable until we had insulation blown into the attic. While it did a great job of keeping the Queen warm, it also gave us row upon row of hairy crack. That was unacceptable.

[This wasn't the worst crack, but I'd already filled the rest in at this point]

I started the priming/caulking job several months ago before I was put on a strict one-room-at-a-time diet. As it was, it was good to be moved to the hall bathroom because I was stuck trying to figure out a way to prime/caulk/paint the ceiling and walls above the hot tub. I didn't want to stand a ladder in the tub and stacking a platform on the rim of the tub wasn't an option either. The tub is fiberglass and most of the weight is supported by the tub's bottom which rests on the sub-floor. The rim which rests upon the tile surround isn't meant to hold any great amount of weight (me plus platform and step ladder). All I needed to do was break our $1400 tub before I ever used it, right?

Well, my wife had a solution to the problem for me.

She saw the dry wall guy do this. Basically, butt the feet of the extension ladder up against the wall, extend it up to the ceiling at nearly a 45 degree angle, and rest it upon the opposite wall. I was reluctant to try it at first (heavy guy + ladder leaning at weird angle against dry wall = hole in wall?), but what the hell. And, it worked.

So, tonight I will give the ceiling it's second and final primer coat. If I have time, I'll finish priming the walls too. Or, I will work on them at any rate. Who knows, maybe we'll have some actual paint up by the end of the week?


Anonymous Anonymous said...

You'd think the ladder would break through the drywall. You might need some plywood between the ladder and the wall

4:07 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I put wood in-between the ladder and wall when I did stair well. I take the wood up with me and push the ladder off the wall a bit with one hand while I slip the wood in to position. I don’t think it will make a hole without the wood, but it could leave some dents.

7:08 PM  
Blogger John said...

Greg & Derek,

An excellent point. I'll have to try that when I work on it tonight. It certainly couldn't hurt.

6:16 AM  
Anonymous davidLBC said...

all this talk of wood and caulk and hairy cracks is just very distracting

1:13 PM  
Blogger John said...

David, isn't it though?

As for the ladder, I checked last night and there was some slight dimpling from the ladder. I'm not sure if it is bad enough to bother smoothing out or not.

I don't know how the drywall guy did it without leaving a mark (maybe he used plywood?). I thinking I'm just fatter is the real explination though.

6:12 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yeah, I didn't even see the crack until you pointed it out (and it's way over head!)
Although I'm sure the house appreciates the effort...

9:04 PM  
Blogger eman alshazly said...

شركه تنظيف منازل بالرياض
شركة تنظيف
تنظيف منازل بالرياض
شركة تنظيف بيوت
شركة تنظيف بيوت بالرياض
شركه تنظيف ستائر بالبخار
شركة تنظيف فلل وقصور
شركة تنظيف واجهات زجاجية
شركة نظافة واجهات حجرية
شركة تنظيف مكاتب وقصور وفلل وشقق

12:58 PM  
Blogger eman alshazly said...

افضل شركة نظافه بالمملكة
شركة رش مبيدات حشرية
رش المبيدات
شركة رش مبيد للبق الفراش
افضل شركة مكافحة حشرات
شركة مكافحة حشرات
مكافحة الحشرات
شركة مكافحه نمل ابيض
شركه تخزين أثاث مع النقل والتغليف والضمان
تخزين اثاث

12:58 PM  
Blogger eman alshazly said...

شركه كشف تسربات المياه إلكترونيا
كشف تسربات
تنظيف فلل
نقل الاثاث
نقل اثاث
نقل عفش
مؤسسة نظافة ونقل أثاث بالرياض
شركه تغليف اثاث مع الفك والتركيب مكاتب وشركات
تنظيف شقق
شركة تنظيف خزانات بالرياض

12:59 PM  
Blogger eman alshazly said...

عزل خزانات
شركة تنظيف مجالس بالرياض
شركة تنظيف موكيت بالرياض
شركة تنظيف بيارات بالرياض
شركة تنظيف مسابح بالرياض
شركات تخزين اثاث بالرياض
افضل شركة لنقل الاثاث بالرياض
نقل اثاث داخل الرياض
شركات نقل عفش في الرياض
شركة رش مبيدات حشرية بالرياض

12:59 PM  
Blogger eman alshazly said...

افضل شركة مكافحة الحشرات بالرياض
شركة رش مبيد بالرياض
شركة مكافحة حشرات
شركة نظافة خزانات بالرياض
شركة عزل خزانات
شركة غسيل خزانات بالرياض
شركات عزل اسطح بالرياض
شركة تنظيف مسابح بالرياض
شركة تنظيف بيوت بالرياض
شركة تنظيف منازل

1:00 PM  
Blogger eman alshazly said...

تنظيف شقق
شركة تنظيف مجالس
شركة كشف تسربات المياه بالرياض
شركة تنظيف موكيت بالرياض
افضل شركة تسليك مجارى
تنظيف فلل بالرياض
افضل شركة تنظيف بالرياض
شركات نظافة بالرياض
بالون المعدة
علاج التخسيس

1:00 PM  
Blogger eman alshazly said...

عمليات التخسيس
أفضل عمليات التخسيس
تدبيس المعدة
عمليات تدبيس المعدة فى مصر
عملية منظار المعدة
عملية تحويل المعدة
تكميم المعدة
عملية المرارة بالمنظار
عملية ربط المعدة
عملية ربط المعدة بالمنظار

1:00 PM  
Blogger eman alshazly said...

عملية تصغير المعدة
بالون المعدة للتخسيس
عملية بالون المعدة فى مصر
جراحات السمنة المفرطة
جراحات السمنة
عملية تدبيس المعدة بالمنظار
استئصال المرارة بالمنظار
جراحة تكميم المعدة
عملية إرتجاع المرئ فتق الحجاب الحاجز بالمنظار
كى العصب السيمبثاوى بالمنظار
تحويل المعدة بالمنظار
عيادات تخسيس
علاج السمنه
افضل شركات تنظيف وتخزين بالرياض

1:01 PM  
Blogger ninest123 Ninest said...

ninest123 11.13
jordan shoes, michael kors outlet, louis vuitton outlet, louis vuitton outlet, burberry handbags, christian louboutin outlet, replica watches, uggs outlet, tory burch outlet, polo outlet, ray ban sunglasses, longchamp outlet, tiffany jewelry, christian louboutin shoes, michael kors outlet online, nike free, michael kors outlet online, nike air max, oakley sunglasses wholesale, ugg boots, michael kors outlet store, gucci handbags, oakley sunglasses, ray ban sunglasses, replica watches, cheap oakley sunglasses, louis vuitton outlet, uggs on sale, tiffany and co, louis vuitton, michael kors outlet online, longchamp outlet, louis vuitton, nike air max, christian louboutin uk, ugg boots, michael kors outlet, christian louboutin, prada handbags, nike outlet, oakley sunglasses, burberry outlet, uggs outlet, polo ralph lauren outlet online, prada outlet, longchamp outlet, oakley sunglasses, ray ban sunglasses

12:56 AM  
Blogger ninest123 Ninest said...

juicy couture outlet, lancel, pandora uk, moncler outlet, moncler, pandora jewelry, louis vuitton, supra shoes, swarovski, converse outlet, michael kors handbags, moncler, thomas sabo, canada goose, pandora charms, juicy couture outlet, barbour uk, louis vuitton, canada goose, louis vuitton, hollister, doudoune moncler, canada goose jackets, ugg pas cher, ugg, montre pas cher, moncler outlet, canada goose outlet, barbour, doke gabbana, canada goose uk, karen millen uk, moncler, louis vuitton, ugg uk, canada goose outlet, replica watches, moncler uk, pandora jewelry, louis vuitton, marc jacobs, links of london, wedding dresses, swarovski crystal, coach outlet, ugg,ugg australia,ugg italia, toms shoes, michael kors outlet, moncler, ugg,uggs,uggs canada, canada goose outlet, canada goose

1:00 AM  
Blogger ninest123 Ninest said...

nike free uk, burberry pas cher, ralph lauren uk, michael kors pas cher, sac vanessa bruno, coach outlet store online, nike air max uk, true religion outlet, nike roshe, ray ban uk, jordan pas cher, michael kors, coach outlet, hollister pas cher, converse pas cher, hollister uk, louboutin pas cher, timberland pas cher, polo ralph lauren, longchamp pas cher, nike trainers uk, north face, lululemon canada, ray ban pas cher, guess pas cher, nike air max, nike blazer pas cher, sac hermes, nike air max uk, mulberry uk, true religion jeans, true religion outlet, hogan outlet, nike huaraches, vans pas cher, true religion outlet, michael kors outlet, north face uk, michael kors, oakley pas cher, coach purses, abercrombie and fitch uk, air max, nike roshe run uk, sac longchamp pas cher, new balance, polo lacoste, nike free run, nike tn, nike air force

1:08 AM  
Blogger ninest123 Ninest said...

abercrombie and fitch, valentino shoes, wedding dresses, mont blanc pens, ghd hair, lululemon, hermes belt, converse, iphone 5s cases, baseball bats, bottega veneta, iphone 6 plus cases, soccer shoes, ray ban, north face outlet, oakley, reebok outlet, iphone cases, vans outlet, iphone 6 cases, asics running shoes, beats by dre, soccer jerseys, nike air max, hollister, vans, mac cosmetics, new balance shoes, ferragamo shoes, nike roshe run, nike air max, babyliss, north face outlet, timberland boots, chi flat iron, herve leger, louboutin, s6 case, celine handbags, ipad cases, mcm handbags, insanity workout, giuseppe zanotti outlet, iphone 6s cases, ralph lauren, jimmy choo outlet, instyler, gucci, p90x workout, iphone 6s plus cases, hollister clothing, nfl jerseys
ninest123 11.13

1:09 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home

Free Web Site Counter
Website Counter