The Devil Queen

How my wife and I sold our souls to the Queen Anne Victorian we tried to save.

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Location: Crow Mountain, Arkansas, United States

Synopsis: This is a cautionary tale. A seriously disturbed couple find the charming, old ruin of a Queen Anne Victorian in Russellville, Arkansas, and buy it for $1.00. They tore the roof off, cut it in half, and had it moved to some land they owned sixteen miles away because they didn't know any better. Since then, they have hired and fired contractors, had all of their tools stolen, re-wired, re-plumbed, insulated, and essentially rebuilt the entire house. Their only problem is that after four years it still isn't finished. Now they are tired, broke, and wonder what in the hell it is they've done to themselves. And, it's haunted.
(Last updated on April 3, 2008)

Press: Russellville Courier Article - December 2003, HGTV website article, AP story - October 2006, and Victorian Homes Magazine - February 2008 (link coming soon).
Art: From time to time, I receive requests for my art. If you would like to look at more of my art, go to The Failed Artist. If you would like to buy my art, email me. I am more than happy to answer any questions you might have. Thanks!

Monday, January 22, 2007

Loosing It

My mind has begun to unravel.

First of all, I've begun dreaming about housebloggers. This is a new experience for me. The other night Gary, Greg, and I were stripping tack & canvas wallpaper out of the three story, brick, Victorian row house. And, two nights ago, my wife and I visited Maryam in Marrakesh. I'm sure Maryam would be interested to know that she had three children ages 10-12, two are girls, and all have dark hair. Also, her home was lovely; it was like the Forbidden City in rich green, amber, and nutty brown.

Second, there is the emotionally charged relationship the living room & dining room ceilings and I have been developing. The main point of contention is their dilapidation and peeling paint is an affront to my existence. The way they sulk around is just depressing. They make me want to murder them.

Third, I've been suffering from insatiable cravings for fresh greens, ripe tomatoes (impossible to find at this time of year), fruit juice, hot tea, and raw fish. Anything else just sets too heavy on the stomach.

Fourth, living in a squalid, den of iniquity has really lost of its charm. You know, at first its is kind of exciting living like a coked-up squatter or five dollar hooker in a flop house, but the novelty of the experience wears off fast. In fact, it is becoming down right depressing.

And fifth, one on my favorite "keyword searches" that has found the Devil Queen is, "hierarchy of evil." This is not to say, "my wife is a dumbass" or "big hairy butt dumps" are not amusing, but I just like the idea that this Godforsaken house is so innately infernal that it rates among the big boys. "Better to rule in Hell . . ."

Maybe I just spent too much of my weekend watching Dumbo with my son (the pink elephants - that is some seriously weird shit for 1947) and eating my own weight in seaweed, but think I'm really picking up some momentum on my downward slide into rocking, gibbering, pissing my pants madness. Who knows, maybe it won't be so bad?

4 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

You are so right about the pink elephants. That part freaked me out as a kid.

9:51 AM  
Anonymous mindy said...

Yeah, old Disney movies aren't exactly happy-go-lucky. Lots of parents dying and whatnot. And super psychedelic! Bound to cause nightmares when you're old enough to question things like singing elephants.

10:51 AM  
Blogger My Marrakech said...

Hmmm...I think that your dream tells of things to come....So I can't wait for you and Scarlet to visit. And I will be looking forward to having that third child I have pined for. At least in my dreams...or maybe that would be in your dreams...

2:03 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

big. hairy. butt. dumps. That's on a whole 'nother level. I thought mine was good with "photos of a spotty arse", but that takes the cake.

2:32 PM  

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