We Are Not Amused

Or, are we?

It occurred to me this morning that there is not one other Victorian house on Houseblogs that has a bathroom that looks anything like this (that I've seen, correct me if I'm wrong).


Take a look around if you haven't already. Here we have some period Victorian bathrooms complements of Greg at Petch House; here are some Greg's musings on bathroom tiles and old toilets; here we have Mindy picking a color scheme for their bathroom at Fixer-Upper; here is Steve and Jocelyn's Chicago 2-Flat rental (I guess technically a 2-Flat isn't a Victorian, but it's not that far off time wise). What do you see? I see lots of classic, classy traditional bathrooms. Subway tiles, immaculate wood work, wainscoting, and more. There is no shortage of beauty here.

So, looking at my bathroom with its two oranges, the ultramarine floor tiles, and sandy colored tiled shower I try to image what this room might look like to a someone with more period appropriate sensibilities might make of it. I'm guessing a clown car maybe? And, I'm not sure why, but I find that possibility quite funny.

So, what gives? Why did I spend over $5000 for custom milled exterior siding to preserve the Devil Queen's historic appearance and then turn around a make a bathroom that looks so modern?

1) This bathroom was not original to the house. Somewhere around 1950 they partitioned off a portion of the front parlor to make room for this bathroom. In case you're wondering, it was hideous.
2) Once we stripped out all of the fake wood paneling, the drop ceiling, the floating chimney, and all the other crap, all we had left was sub-par framing and butchered wall boards & ceiling. There wasn't anything to restore (unless we demolished the whole thing and returned it to the parlor).
3) We were completely broke, so we had to use what we could afford or what was available.

That said, it still doesn't account for our color selection. I say "our," but I really mean Scarlet. For all the weird shit that I do and display here, I'm a fairly reserved person most of the time. Dull. Stuffy. Boring. While I haven't quite joined the "I see window treatments" club (yet), I do have actual opinions on color schemes, decorating, et cetera. They tend to be safe, understated choices. However, over time I've succumbed to Scarlet's way of seeing things, and Scarlet is nothing if not flamboyant. I know, "succumbed" makes it sound like I died of a disease, but don't be fooled. I actually like living outside of my chromatic comfort zone. And, I've come a long way over the years. I nearly died when she told me she wanted to paint two kitchen walls purple.

At this point, I will pretty well use any color scheme she selects (thought I did rebel when she suggested that I paint the laundry room's window trim four different colors). She picked orange, so I painted it orange. And, I liked it. In this windowless room, the bright colors make me happy. And hungry (the trim looks but does not taste like orange sherbet).

I was pretty pleased with it and was excited to show off my handy work to Scarlet. She took one look at it and her eyes popped out of her head.

"OH MY GOD. I knew it was orange, but that is really ORANGE."

My son rounds the corner, stops, and points at the wall. "Wow. Orange." Pointing at the trim, "Momma, Orange!"

"Yes Giddy, that is definitely orange." Scarlet turns to me, "Do you like it?"

I heard the panic creeping into her voice.

"Yes."

I'll admit it. I suffered a moment of doubt, but I still like it. And, as it turns out, Scarlet (after living with it a little) and Gideon do too. However, the real test was Christmas, but that will have to be another post.