Houseblog Resurrection

I slit my throat this morning, so I believe the stars are right for resurrection.

The slit throat is an exaggeration of course. I did have a spectacular shaving accident this morning, probably the worst I've ever had. The blood was free flowing. It makes a strong case for thorough caffeination before grooming with razors.

I am serious about the resurrection. To put it charitably, this blog has languished on a becalmed sea too long. Not that this is particularly profound, but I had the recently realization that it's time to finish the Devil Queen. Really. Money is still a problem, but I can work around it for now. However, if I can find $135 by August 8th, I will rent a drum sander.

There is no shortage of things to do. What has been occupying my mind are the following:

1) The floors. They need to be puttied, sanded, and refinished. At this point, I would lay new floors in the living room and dining room if I could afford it. That would cost $2000, so it's not an option. Lots of wood putty and sanding is however.

2) The ceilings. All of them have been stripped down to the bar wood and primed. Most still need to be caulked (Gee, is that insulation I see?) and painted. As they are now, they are fucking hideous.

3) The front door. It is so warped that it is beyond repair. It's replacement is imminent.

4) Paint. Most of the Devil Queen's interior is painted. A good bit of it needs to be touched-up. This includes pretty much anything that is white, mostly doors, trim, and wainscoting. While I'm at it, I'm actually paint all the white the same white. Apparently, there is a noticeable difference between cheap white paint from Wal-Mart and cheap white paint from Lowe's. Well, I think so.

5) Caulk. Since I'll be doing lots of remedial painting, it's the perfect time to do some more caulking. You know, fill all the holes in the walls, giant cracks, spider dens, and other unwholesome crevasses.

6) Storm windows. Sure, it's hot ass the Devil's foreskin now, but winter cometh. I'd like to keep our electric bill in the low triple digits this winter.

7) The master bedroom has musty alcove separated from the rest of the room by an approximation of a door. I understand that this may in fact be a closet. If so, I'd like to line it with cedar of some sort and use it as one.

8) Kill the spiders. Does that really need an explanation?

9) Mow the goddamn grass. Or burn it, which is cheaper since I have a lighter but not a lawn mower.

Scarlet and Gideon will be away on vacation all next week, so I'll be all alone for the better part of 10 days. This includes two weekends. It sounds like the perfect time to completely trash the house, sleep in, have a few beers, and put the bugger back together. And, if I'm feeling frisky, I'll tackle Special Project #10, Satan's Bung-hole. This is otherwise known as "remedial plumbing." Don't worry, I'll post the money shot if I make it.