The Devil Queen

How my wife and I sold our souls to the Queen Anne Victorian we tried to save.

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Location: Crow Mountain, Arkansas, United States

Synopsis: This is a cautionary tale. A seriously disturbed couple find the charming, old ruin of a Queen Anne Victorian in Russellville, Arkansas, and buy it for $1.00. They tore the roof off, cut it in half, and had it moved to some land they owned sixteen miles away because they didn't know any better. Since then, they have hired and fired contractors, had all of their tools stolen, re-wired, re-plumbed, insulated, and essentially rebuilt the entire house. Their only problem is that after four years it still isn't finished. Now they are tired, broke, and wonder what in the hell it is they've done to themselves. And, it's haunted.
(Last updated on April 3, 2008)

Press: Russellville Courier Article - December 2003, HGTV website article, AP story - October 2006, and Victorian Homes Magazine - February 2008 (link coming soon).
Art: From time to time, I receive requests for my art. If you would like to look at more of my art, go to The Failed Artist. If you would like to buy my art, email me. I am more than happy to answer any questions you might have. Thanks!

Thursday, June 07, 2007

The Room of Unspeakable Pleasures

This looks innocuous enough, no? A fully functional toilet (the third and final one for the Devil Queen) and sink in our laundry room/third bathroom.

And here is the tub, our wicked, sinful tub.

Kristin, I blame you. Ever since I read this post of yours, I can never look at this plumbing fixture the same again.

You've shattered my innocence. I feel like the guy who walks in on the long-haired hippie licking the LSD off Hunter S. Thompson's red flannel shirt in Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas.

"With a bit of luck, his life was ruined forever. Always thinking that just behind some narrow door in all of his favorite bars, men in red woolen shirts are getting incredible kicks from things he'll never know."

Thanks to you, my slide into utter depravity has begun already. Before too long, all that will be left for me will be rum, sodomy, and the lash.

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Anonymous Tarr said...

rum, sodomy, and the lash

One good evening can take care of that.

4:24 PM  
Anonymous April said...

Just don't let the kid get ahold of it. My boy got ahold of a hand held shower attachment at my old apartment. And it definetly has the 'cool squirt gun' factor. Big mess.

10:09 PM  
Blogger John said...

Tarr, bless you. I like the way you think.

April, I hadn't thought of that. Hmmm. Nice.

6:47 AM  
Anonymous Julia said...

You know, I never thought I'd say something like this but I really like your choice of toilet. It goes quite nicely in the room.

I also wanted to tell you that my husband has now contracted your disease where we are watching TV or a movie and he comments on the wall color or some furniture or a fixture.

1:33 PM  
Anonymous Kathy from NJ said...

I also love the toilet. Would you mind telling us the manufacturer & model?

6:17 AM  
Anonymous Lisa said...

I am seriously loving that tub.

4:28 PM  
Anonymous Kathy from NJ said...

I went back & looked at the master bath again. Did you use the same toilet there (can only see a small portion in the pic)? I've look on Kohler, Eljer & American Std web sites for that toilet and can't find it. It is so beautiful that I'm not sure I'd be able to use it for it's intended purpose.

8:10 PM  
Anonymous marye said...

it looks great. Love the color on the wall...
and hand showers are ..nice. :)

6:51 PM  
Blogger Kristin said...

Now, John, don't go blaming me - we all know you were twisted and depraved well before I wrote that post. :)

2:58 PM  
Anonymous mindy said...

Hahahah... oh, yes, Kristin's post had me laughing and yours does too. I love F&LILV. So many quotable lines...

Your sinful tub looksht awesome!

5:42 AM  
Blogger Jason & Heather said...

I believe the toilet is from a company called Mancesa. I saw one that looks exactly like it at Lowes just yesterday.

The bathroom looks great by the way!

7:24 AM  
Anonymous Kathy from NJ said...

For Jason & Heather - I couldn't leave a note on your blog because I don't have (or want) another account & password. Thanks for the info on the toilet - I googled Mancesa & found the toilet - it's less expensive in bone than the UPCHARGE ONLY (from white to bone) on any Kohler toilet. I'll try to get to Lowes one of these days & look for it.

2:52 PM  
Blogger Jason & Heather said...

The Lowes website has the toilet listed as Jameco. I dont think they offer it in bone though.

If I weren't using antique toilets in my house these are the ones I would be using, I really like the style of them.

8:30 PM  
Blogger John said...

I was going to tell you all about the toilet, but Jason beat me to it. That is fine because he's been absolutely right about all of it (the model, Lowe's website misnaming it, etc).

We've used this model for all three of our bathrooms and been pretty pleased with it. The only bad thing I can say about them is that two out of the three were missing parts. Nothing earth shattering like the tank, but annoying none the less. The second one was missing the chain for flushing and the third one was missing the T-bolts to attach it to the floor. I suppose I could have picked a fight with Lowe's over it and tried to get replacement parts for free, but it was just easier to spend a buck or two more an buy a replacement. Still, I'd buy this model again if I had a fourth bathroom.

6:10 AM  
Blogger John said...

Thanks everyone!

And you're right Kristin, I was pretty bad off to start with, so blaming you for all of it isn't fair. However, you have added a small bit to my already substantial mental baggage. Don't worry, I've got room for plenty more.

6:13 AM  

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